Here is a link to an article on how a coffee group turned into a help organization. I would not be surprised if these guys also do other things together, besides give free advice.
Just in case giving advice is new to you. Here is a YouTube video on how to give advice
You spent 40 plus years paying attention to and planning your Breadwinning career. Work-related issues and problems filled your mind on the job and when at home. Now that is gone, but your mind has not moved on. Just like your planning for retirement where you were given financial advice on saving for retirement. You maintained a 401K, set aside money from your family for your own future use. You may have even gotten get help by engaging a financial planner to guide your investing. You were told that hobbies and vacations will fill your days with happiness and purpose. It may, but not likely. The book “Retirement How NOT to end up Tired, Bored and Lonely” is an excellent introduction to this next part of your life. In retirement, you need to rediscover yourself and your new purpose.
I wake up early, wash up, get dressed and go to the gym or bike for 45 minutes. Now what? I could stay at the gym or bike ride for the day and have bragging rights, but I would still be alone. My mother like to say a job solves all your problems. So what is the path to pleasure, happiness, and purpose in retirement?
The trick is do repeat what you did when you were a teen. Just go out and try it. If it does not work, pick something else and try again. Do it out of the house and with people. Just like when you were a teen and went to play in the neighborhood. If this is outside of your comfort zone. That ok. It was when you were a teen and you survived.
A YouTube Video on stepping outside your comfort zone.
The bottom line is you can now choose a purpose that does not force you to support your family. A choice that give you pleasure and happiness.
Retirement options are different for men and for women. Men who lost their tribe want to start over. They may be having social anxiety and are lost without a “job”. They suggest:
Take a Winnebago trip across the county
Move to new housing in a different state
Move to a summer home in the middle of a forest
They are running away, from their feeling of isolation and loss of purpose in their lives. They are alone in their man caves. No matter where you end up living, the challenge is when you get to where you are going you still need to find and grow the tribe of people to have pleasure, happiness and purpose in your retirement years. Bottom line it does not matter where, but with whom you are living that is the leading driver for where to retire. The one key question is:
Are you living within 15 minutes of family or “true” friend?
They key to successful retirement is not being isolated and alone. You will need to find and develop “Purpose” and that means interacting with people to achieve a goal. True friends and family are great companions in this journey.
Other key considerations are:
If you live in the middle of nowhere, you are nowhere. Make sure community resources are within a 15 to 30-minute drive e.g. shopping, entertainment, hospitals, doctors, housing, public transportation, etc. Reconsider what give you purpose and happiness. You have almost spent your entire life working for family, career and wealth. Each day ask yourself: “What do give you pleasure, happiness and purpose?” Change those things that do not. Start small with what you like to eat for lunch. What shirts you like to wear. Choose and keep choosing. Watch the small things, the big items will follow Live within your financial means. Happiness is not found in conspicuous consumption. When you pay people for a service, these people are paid to be nice to you. It is not a acquaintance or a relationship, just a moment in time where you are distracted form your real life.
Here is a video of two women discussing handling and repurposing your life in retirement. Enjoy
You spent 40 plus years paying attention to and planning your Breadwinning career. Work-related issues and problems filled your mind on the job and when at home. Now that is gone, but your mind has not moved on. Just like your planning for retirement where you were given financial advice on saving for retirement. You maintained a 401K, set aside money from your family for your own future use. You may have even gotten get help by engaging a financial planner to guide your investing. You were told that hobbies and vacations will fill your days with happiness and purpose. It may, but not likely. The book “Retirement How NOT to end up Tired, Bored and Lonely” is an excellent introduction to this next part of your life. In retirement you need to rediscover yourself and your new purpose.
Flyer announcing author presentation and discussion on retirement at Middletown Library on October 22 at 7PM
You spent 40 plus years paying attention to and planning your Breadwinning career. Work-related issues and problems filled your mind on the job and when at home. Now that is gone, but your mind has not moved on. Just like your planning for retirement where you were given financial advice on saving for retirement. You maintain a 401K, set aside money from your family for your own future use. You may even get help by engaging a financial planner to guide your investing. You were told that hobbies and vacations will fill your days with happiness and purpose. It may, but not likely. The book “Retirement How NOT to end up Tired, Bored and Lonely” is an excellent introduction to this next part of your life. In retirement you need to rediscover yourself and your new purpose.
I am discovering me. I cooked shrimp scampi, pork chops with broccoli in butter sauce and tomorrow hope to pan fry a chuck steak with onions. I felt accomplished by cooking and it really tastes good.
My purpose at that moment was to cook a good meal that I and others enjoy. Taking the moment to buy the food, prepare and cook it, create a fond memory that I want to repeat. It is not as grand as being a Breadwinner or eliminating world hunger. Though it did give me a sense of accomplishment, sharing and happiness. Could it be that purpose is more intimate and personal and is the result of you living, rather then something you go too.
The question is if purpose came up and introduced him or herself to you, would you recognize it?
A YouTube Video That you find your passions and purpose by living your life!
You spent 40 plus years paying attention to and planning your Breadwinning career. Work-related issues and problems filled your mind on the job and when at home. Now that is gone, but your mind has not moved on. Just like your planning for retirement where you were given financial advice on saving for retirement. You maintain a 401K, set aside money from your family for your own future use. You may even get help by engaging a financial planner to guide your investing. You were told that hobbies and vacations will fill your days with happiness and purpose. It may, but not likely. The book “Retirement How NOT to end up Tired, Bored and Lonely” is an excellent introduction to this next part of your life. In retirement you need to rediscover yourself and your new purpose.
