financial

Retirement has started, so where do I go? What do i do? Part II.

~ admin ~ Leave a comment

You walk outside your home and you are lost. No place to go, Isolated and feeling anxious about not having alternatives. Here is what others have tried as transition into retirement to avoid the loneliness and depression of not having a life.

Shop for sales
Go to retail stores and get daily sales. This gets you out of the house, to be among people and interact with store clerks. Your family will appreciate what you buy. If not you can return the items until you understand their needs.

Estate and Garage Sales
Go to estate and garage sales and start collecting lamps, small statues, bottles of cologne, marbles, trains, etc. then sell them on eBay to cover your costs plus profit for your wife. You get to work with people on both ends and you set time and effort within your limits. See if you can join an ebay club in your area or a local training program.

Cook
Take over cooking dinners. Yes, be Mister Mom. Cook, shop for groceries, clean the refrigerator, prepare the meals, expand your comfort zone into new areas. This will be appreciated by all.

Physical Activity
Use an e-bike and go riding. Yes, take the physical challenge out and meet people riding. The idea is to go out and meet other riders rather then physical activity for muscle building or sweating. Join a bike club. You can go on A+ rides with the e-bike and not have to turn yourself inside out physically. You will be pleasantly surprised how much fun and purpose you will have.

Part Time Job
Be a school bus driver for 2 to 4 hours a day. Home Depot and Lowes offers part time work where you can pick your hours. Get out of the house, you get a great feeling of accomplishment by helping other people and get a little extra money to boot.

The objective is to get out of the house and do something that gets you with people doing something that you enjoy. You already had a career and earned lots of money. The direction is to find people you can make friends with.

Great video with good overview and some excellent recommendations on how to find good opportunities

You spent 40 plus years paying attention to and planning your Breadwinning career. Work-related issues and problems filled your mind on the job and when at home. Now that is gone, but your mind has not moved on. Just like your planning for retirement where you were given financial advice on saving for retirement. You maintained a 401K, set aside money from your family for your own future use. You may have even gotten get help by engaging a financial planner to guide your investing. You were told that hobbies and vacations will fill your days with happiness and purpose. It may, but not likely. The book “Retirement How NOT to end up Tired, Bored and Lonely” is an excellent introduction to this next part of your life. In retirement, you need to rediscover yourself and your new purpose.

Retirement Surprises – Depression, Anxiety and Suicide – Part II Anxiety

~ admin ~ Leave a comment

We last looked at depression. Anxiety is the same in that you see no outward changes in your body but tremendous effect on your emotions, heart rate and stress levels. You are attacked by a tiger and your body responds even after the tiger (trigger) leaves.

We have a trigger that is with us 24/7, in retirement!

Here are some videos of people going through anxiety attacks:

This first video show the range of when an attach can occur and some alternatives to manage the event.

Listen to the intensity and lack of empowerment in the solution process.

Listen to the history of triggers, self-guilt and uncertainty.

Let us look at the how often retires experience anxiety attacks. A study of males over 50 show an an approximate 10% increase over younger males in depression and anxiety, Link.

We can assume that anxiety rates follow depression rates which mean 5% of the retirement population will suffer severe attacks and from 5% to 25% will suffer mild to suffer anxiety as part of the retirement journey.

The next blog will be on suicide and we will start the journey on alternative methods to help deal with the challenging three, Depression, Anxiety and Suicide.

You spent 40 plus years paying attention to and planning your Breadwinning career. Work-related issues and problems filled your mind on the job and when at home. Now that is gone, but your mind has not moved on. Just like your planning for retirement where you were given financial advice on saving for retirement. You maintained a 401K, set aside money from your family for your own future use. You may have even gotten get help by engaging a financial planner to guide your investing. You were told that hobbies and vacations will fill your days with happiness and purpose. It may, but not likely. The book “Retirement How NOT to end up Tired, Bored and Lonely” is an excellent introduction to this next part of your life. In retirement you need to rediscover yourself and your new purpose.

Retirement Surprises – Depression, Anxiety and Suicide – Part I Depression

~ admin ~ Leave a comment

You have successfully managed your money and have enough to live comfortably. Surprise, you may have just set yourself up for the most challenging and stressful time of your life. It turns out that after a brief busy period following retirement, 4% of retirees have severe depression and almost 25% suffer mild to severe depression. This does not include anxiety attacks or suicides.

Here is a YouTube video that reminds you that retirement means a new effort to find your pleasure, happiness and purpose and the need to find a new tribe. Just like when you were a teenager, you need friends:

This great YouTube video by a retiree discuses some truths of retirement’s challenges.

National Institute of Health (NIH) study that shows that a full 23+ percent of retirees suffers mild to moderate depression and almost 4% suffers severe depression
Link to Study

You spent 40 plus years paying attention to and planning your Breadwinning career. Work-related issues and problems filled your mind on the job and when at home. Now that is gone, but your mind has not moved on. Just like your planning for retirement where you were given financial advice on saving for retirement. You maintained a 401K, set aside money from your family for your own future use. You may have even gotten get help by engaging a financial planner to guide your investing. You were told that hobbies and vacations will fill your days with happiness and purpose. It may, but not likely. The book “Retirement How NOT to end up Tired, Bored and Lonely” is an excellent introduction to this next part of your life. In retirement you need to rediscover yourself and your new purpose.

Retire to Purpose – Would you recognize it?

~ admin ~ Leave a comment

I am discovering me. I cooked shrimp scampi, pork chops with broccoli in butter sauce and tomorrow hope to pan fry a chuck steak with onions. I felt accomplished by cooking and it really tastes good.

My purpose at that moment was to cook a good meal that I and others enjoy. Taking the moment to buy the food, prepare and cook it, create a fond memory that I want to repeat. It is not as grand as being a Breadwinner or eliminating world hunger. Though it did give me a sense of accomplishment, sharing and happiness. Could it be that purpose is more intimate and personal and is the result of you living, rather then something you go too.

The question is if purpose came up and introduced him or herself to you, would you recognize it?

A YouTube Video That you find your passions and purpose by living your life!

You spent 40 plus years paying attention to and planning your Breadwinning career. Work-related issues and problems filled your mind on the job and when at home. Now that is gone, but your mind has not moved on. Just like your planning for retirement where you were given financial advice on saving for retirement. You maintain a 401K, set aside money from your family for your own future use. You may even get help by engaging a financial planner to guide your investing. You were told that hobbies and vacations will fill your days with happiness and purpose. It may, but not likely. The book “Retirement How NOT to end up Tired, Bored and Lonely” is an excellent introduction to this next part of your life. In retirement you need to rediscover yourself and your new purpose.

Retirement First steps to the rest of your life – Purpose

~ admin ~ Leave a comment

Congratulations you have retired. Saved enough so you have food to eat, money to travel and can still climb a flight of stairs. You have been successful in your Breadwinner career and providing for your family. In retirement you need to find your new purpose that give you pleasure, happiness and accomplishment (purpose). Sometimes this is hard to share with others and yourself so you can maintain direction in your life.

Do you know your purpose in retirement?

Here is a Ted YouTube video on how to verbalize your retirements lifes purpose

You spent 40 plus years paying attention to and planning your Breadwinning career. Work-related issues and problems filled your mind on the job and when at home. Now that is gone, but your mind has not moved on. Just like your planning for retirement where you were given financial advice on saving for retirement. You maintain a 401K, set aside money from your family for your own future use. You may even get help by engaging a financial planner to guide your investing. You are told that hobbies and vacations will fill your days with happiness and purpose. It may, but not likely. The book “Retirement How NOT to end up Tired, Bored and Lonely” is an excellent introduction to this next part of your life. In retirement you need to rediscover yourself and your new purpose.

Meditation in Retirement – Managing Negative thoughts

~ admin ~ Leave a comment

Meditation in retirement is not meant to solve problems but to accept them as they exist so you can have time to discover yourself. Each of us have our individual views on what makes a good life. Some we adopted from our tribe, others we made up as we moved through our lives. You need to free yourself from the things that stop you from finding yourself, that person who has pleasure and purpose in during your retirement. You need to learn to manage your thoughts and judgments you developed over the last 60+ years so you can find yourself and what makes you feel right about you.

If you spend your time commenting on things that you cannot control, not part of your life and you view are wrong. Like:

Your brother in laws lifestyle is a waste of time.
Younger kids have no social skills because of their phones.
Reasons why you will not use a smartphone.
Why Amazon is bad for the world

You need to manage your thought list so they are items about you not other people?

A ted talk on feeling good about ourselves:

Ted talk about how we think empty, rather then half full. Hope this makes you aware so to better manage your lists and remember the good stuff!:

You spent 40 plus years paying attention and planning your Big money career. Now that is gone, but your mind has not moved on. Just like your planning for retirement where you were given financial advice on saving for retirement. You maintain a 401K, set aside money from your family for your own future use. You may even get help by engaging a financial planner to guide your investing. You are told that hobbies and vacations will fill your days with happiness and purpose. It may, but not likely.

Loneliness one of the great challenges of retirement

~ admin ~ 2 Comments

Loneliness is a major challenge when you retire. Once you leave work, you leave behind the majority of your social contacts.
The recommendation of hobbies and arts are typically single person activities.

A lonely retirement is like be in a minimum security prison with kitchen privileges

Research has found that loneliness has the same impact on mortality as smoking 15 cigarettes a day, making it even more dangerous than obesity.

How do you deal with being lonely?

Can you die of loneliness?

In my book “Retirement How NOT to end up Lonely, Tires and Bored” . I go over the steps to become aware of what give you pleasure and purpose and building a tribe.

A video on alternatives from accepting to being alone to stepping out of your comfort zone “How to deal with loneliness.”

During your career, you are given financial advice on saving for retirement. You maintain a 401K, set aside money from your family for your own future use.  You may even get help by engaging a financial planner to guide your investing.  You are told that hobbies and vacations will fill your days with happiness and purpose. It may, but not likely.

What is a real friend?

~ admin ~ Leave a comment

Friends are not acquaintances. A friend is someone who you can

-Trust to tell you the truth, even if they disagree with you
-Will come when called
-Shared a meal and
-Shared your feeling and thoughts without judgement

What is a real friend?

Do you have a friend?

Doing the financial planning, savings in a 401K, getting the best financial advice is only part of a successful retirement.

Meditation – Finding your true self vs looking good

~ admin ~ 1 Comment

In retirement you have left behind your role of provider and head of household. You are now a 60+ year old adultescent looking for friends and purpose that is centered around your pleasures and purposes. Just like you were as a teenager. The challenge is to find those pleasures and activities that give you pleasure, happiness and purpose.

As a teenager you sought friends and activities to share with them.

A video by Tony Robbins on finding yourself (your needs) and creating a blueprint for retirement so that your second life is as rewarding as your first.

Question: What is your blueprint of retirement? Continue reading →

Retirement – Acquaintance or Friend – Loneliness

~ admin ~ Leave a comment

A friend or an acquaintance can make the difference between during retirement.

A friend is someone who you have:
–Shared a meal with you recently
–When called will come
–May not agree with you, but always tells the truth

Ask yourself, how many friends do I have?

The only thing keeping you from being happy is the belief that you are alone.- Anne Drapper (Mad men)

All the people wo you pay for service, work with gym junkies that fill your day are most likely acquaintances. A short story to bring the point home.

I locked myself out of my car at YMCA. I asked a gym buddy, someone I have had conversations with to give me a ride home for the spare key. His response, you can go inside, and the people can help you. The financial advisors who help you save money and help plan for your happy life, most likely won’t give you a ride home

A video to help.